Embrace Your Individuality

Embracing Your Individuality

I’ve been pondering over this topic for weeks. Wondering if this is something I really felt needed to be addressed. I came the conclusion that it is an important topic because I notice that a lot of people struggle with embracing their individuality.

I know it sounds crazy but society I have promoted certain standards for decades and even centuries and some people struggle to embracing their own personal likes and dislike because of these standards.

For Example: Who created the standard of what is black and what is white?

Just because the majority of the people that shares the same race as you love to listen to hip hop and r&b. Doesn’t make you less black because you love country and rock.

You have to stop trying to fit into a box of what is considered “normal”, because in all actuality what is considered normal today. Would be labeled abnormal or outdated tomorrow.

It is perfectly okay to admit the you love things that most people don’t understand.

For Example: I personally love darker hues of every color (Violet, Black Blue, Emerald and etc) and most likely you would catch me wearing most black and grays. I just happen to like these things but I’m in no way gothic or emo.

We are all made differently from one another. Yet, we define ourselves based on similarity.

For Example: “Oh we are both 25 years old and she still reads manga, how childish?”

Embrace, your difference and never be ashamed of admitting what you like as a person. These are the things that make us who we are and anyone who can’t accept that. Doesn’t accept you..

I really hoped this help someone…

Love You Guys! XOXOXOX

Petals Falling Until Next Time…

Are You Moving To Fast? (Relationship Advice)

Most of us who have been in relationship with that special someone have always came to a point where they have wondered if they were moving too fast. In the beginning of our relationships one thing that both individuals can agree upon is that they are fond of each other but sometimes that fondness could be wrongfully read as something a little bit deeper than it should be.

The touching and the smooches and the “three word phrase” that have the ability to make or break a relationship is the point we all want to get to. However, they’re factors to consider when the relationship is still young.  Especially, for someone who haven’t been in the dating scene for a long time.

As human beings we have to understand that we all have the same goals and finding that someone that is truly ours until we take our last breath happens to be one of them. We are genetically made up to crave love and affection. After being single of a long period of time when getting emotionally involved with someone again we tend to act on the things that we were missing a lot quicker then we should. It’s like going on diet for months and when we decide to treat ourselves to something sweet, then end up eating a whole container of ice cream. When our bodies are deprived we tend to go over board when we reintroduce those things back into our lives.

We have to read our relationships. By asking ourselves a few questions. Questions such as is this love I’m feeling or lust? These are two different feelings associated with budding unions between two individuals. Lust is something that is more physical and love is more emotional. When you figure out your answer to this question. Then you should ask yourself the question of how much do you know about the person your with? People tend to naturally show others what they feel would make them look good in that person eyes. Hiding the ugly aspects of their lives until that person is emotionally invested in them. For Example: Most of the brave women who have endured abuse and spoke out about it tends to start their stories along the lines of a statement that sounds like: “He was so sweet at first then something changed”. Give your self time to read the person you’re with. Give yourself 90 days to gather information (Pay attention to those red flags, behavioral flaws and etc). After those 90 days (three months) you should have a general idea of who you’re dealing with but don’t stop reading the person your with. Also pay attention to how that person interact with others besides you. Based on that you would develop a sense of how that person is in different situations. For example: If a guy is trash talking his ex or the mother of his child to you. Then there’s a chance he would do the same thing to you if things don’t work out.

These are a few ways to discover whether you should take your relationship to another level. Just be smart about it because most of us are crossing that bridge of being too old to not only be playing games but wasting time that could be spent bettering yourself for “the right person”.

I hope this helped someone!!

Love You, Guy! Xoxoxo

Petals Falling Until Next Time!

Become a better you in between relationships!

Many people tend to dread being single. Especially, in these colder months (wink, wink) but sometimes we have to understand that because we are single doesn't mean that we are undesirable or unattractive. We do not have to be defined by being in a relationship with another person. I know so many women that are satisfied with having a piece of a man instead of not having one at all. They would endure the cheating, lying, abuse, and etc all because they don't want to be single. 

People have to understand that in between relationships is for healing and reinventing yourself. I personally could never understand how a person can go from relationship to relationship. If you truly care about someone there isn't anyway in the world that the next day you can be with someone else if your able to do that then you never felt as deep about that person as you thought (that another topic for another blog  )

In between relationships is the time for you to reflect, Discover what you really want in a partner , Evaluate yourself and etc. When you do these thing not only would the process of letting go become easier but you would grow as a person.

For Example: I've been single for sometime now. After my last so called relationship. I went through a lot internally it took awhile but now I'm at a point in my life were I know what I want and anything the seems like the total opposite gets dropped quickly. I'm a woman that deserves the best of the best someone that is truly given to me from God. So the moment a guy comes off sideways I side swipe and keep it moving. I personally have a lot to offer to a relationship and if a guy can't see that then he ain't for me. This is something I would have never discovered if I had became a serial dater after that relationship.

What I'm saying is become a better you. If you feel like you want to become physically, emotionally, and mentally healthier between relationships then do that. Maybe during your self evaluation period you discovered somethings within your self that you aren't please with that may have contribute to the fall of your pervious relationship it's ok work on it. Whatever. you decide to do never enter into a relationship completely fragile. Man aren't looking for broken hearted miserable paranoid females but women they can build a empire with and you can build a stable empire with a unstable empress  and vice versa.

Hope this helped someone!

Love You Guys!

Petals Falling Until Next Time!

The Power of Self Belief

The Power of Self Belief

In life they're many decisions that we as growing individuals would decide to make. Rather those decisions are to start your own business, chase your dream, change your body image, or whatever your thing would make life better for you.

During these times in our lives we would realize that those around us aren't as supportive as we thought they would be or some are just down right discarding your ambitions because they don't believe you can achieve certain goals within your life.

You have to also realize that at the end of the it doesn't matter what those people think but how you view yourself. If you believe that you can do it no one and their negativity should be able to discourage you.

For every negative view on your dreams. It should be another spark within you that make you what to fight harder to achieve them. However, I'm not saying that you should disregard positive criticism. Which would only come from critics that what to see you grow and become better.

This is were you have to be able to tell the difference between positive criticism and straight disrespect on your trade it's simple but can be confusing. A person who is a positive critic would never tell you to quit but suggest ways you can approve (One short way to tell the difference). Even with this you have to believe in your self enough to determine rather you agree with their advice are not.

Sorry, I got off topic a bit!

Anywho, never let the lack of love towards your dream or the amount of time it takes for you to accomplish your dreams hinder you from pursuing them further. 

There's are going to be many times where people aren't going to see your vision. Times where they would classify those visions as nonsensical or immature. Times where it seems like time is running out or your becoming to old to accomplish these goals and dreams

Don't believe the lies from the enemy lingering in your mind. Keep your faith, hope, and you drive to reach for your personal stars no matter how far away they may seem! If you haven't started to reach for those stars because of other people views on them. Then start them today! Stop waiting for a fan base and other people to believe in you.

Hope this helped someone!

Love You Guys! xoxoxo!

Petals Falling Until Next Time!

When Should You Let Go?

Sometimes letting go of something is the hardest thing for us to do. Rather it's a person, a item, or a situation. However, in order to grow they're somethings we have to part ways with.

We tend to hold on to people based on our past relationship with that person. We don't realize that what once made that relationship strong has faded away and as human being we constantly have hope that things would go back to the way they use to be. You have to understand that some individuals aren't meant to stay in our life forever. Like the saying goes "Some people are in you life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime". Discovering what purpose a person served within your life is crucial when trying to figure out if you should keep them around.

 When I was a teenager I was very rebellious during that period in my life I met a lot of people. Some were people that would hold a position in my life for the long haul and somewhere just there for the moment. When reflecting back on past friendships. I began to realize that most of my friends were gained through the carefree and wild attitude I once had and now that I'm more mature and conduct myself differently those people and myself no longer have anything in common. Which make it obvious that being a rebel was the glue that stuck us together and over the years that glue have lost it's tackiness.

Signs you need to let go..!

• If you are in any sort of a relationship with a person and you feel drained. No relationship should make you feel exhausted after being around that person. Now I'm meaning this as a recurrent feeling from being around this person not just a single occasion.
• If you have to prepare yourself to deal with that individual in a negative way . For Example: Say you and your home girl Keisha are planning to meet up later and you dread it to your soul, because Keisha just seem to carry around bad energy and you just know your gonna have a headache after being around her. So you make sure your either not sober upon linking up or have your turn up in a close range.( Simply because you going to need it before the night is over)
• If that person seems to low key diss you all the time. We have all had that friend you know that friend that for whatever reason can't compliment you without throwing in some shady ish. They say things like "Girl that dress is cute but that stomach tho" or " I see you in college now, if you didn't play around you would've been done" There's a thin line between being blunt and throwing shade.
• If that person act and treat you like you're beneath them.
• If you find your self in a competition all the time with that person.
• If that person make empty promises all that time. For Example: I once had a friend that would promise the moon and the sky and me being a silly billy I trusted her to come through when she said she would and every time she never did. However, she managed to be reliable when it came to everyone else. It didn't take long before our conversations became non-existing.
• If a person is hindering your personal growth.
• If a person tends to classify you by the mistakes you made in your past. Just because you made those mistakes doesn't mean that you deserve to be labeled according to them. (Check Out Tomorrows Blog for this topic)
• If that person just don't fit in your life anymore.

This list could go on forever but let's be honest we all know when a person have wore out their welcome in our lives. Moving on with your life is okay! Don't feel guilty for doing so.

Let me clarify somethings. Just because your letting those people go doesn't mean you do not care about them. In many cases if that person makes you feel a certain way. Than chances are you, yourself isn't sunshine and apple pie within their lives either. For the same reason your holding on they maybe holding on too. You just might have to be the one to break the bondage between the two of you in order for the both of you to flourish. Be honest with that person let them know how you feel and if there's room for changes. If you and that person could work on it then do so! For Example: Tell Keisha she carries bad energy and you feel drain when around her, Keisha may not recognize this herself and try to change because of your honesty, Improving your friendship with her in the long run. Now, when I say let go I mean it in the sense of loving that person from a distance and if there's value in that relationship then that bond would never actually break.

I really hoped this made sense (In didn't prewrite this one) and helped someone.

Love You Guys! XOXO!

Petals Falling Until Next Time!

Treat People the Way You Wanna be Treated!

I know some of you are probably thinking that this is such a elementary piece of advice but honestly this is one of those messages that I feel is the Holy Grail to having a wonderful life. Now I'm not saying that if you treat everyone they way you want to be treated that no one is going to mistreat you. However, why should you go around treating other human beings in a nasty manner?

I remember (I hope my personal life references aren't getting aggravating) when I was at a stage in my life where I was just angry. I had reasons to be angry but my anger at one point was actually taking over my life. I must admit sometimes I'm still a very angry person but before I was just so upset about every single thing and it projected out of me in a way where people that I would meet saw it. During this brief period in my life I was being a total bitch to almost everyone around me.

It was like I was protecting myself from being hurt not realizing that in the process I was doing the same thing to people that others were doing to me. (A low blow artist) That's exactly what I was the type of person that would say or bring up something just to hurt someone and sad to say I use to pride myself over it.

It wasn't until I started to pay attention to how things made me feel. That it dawned on me that I was make others feel the same way.We all know I'm not prefect but I don't try to hurt people anymore matter of fact I try to avoid drama and arguments all together theses days.

What I'm trying to say is you can't expect something you aren't willing to give . If you don't respect other people regardless of how they live their lives how can you expect someone to respect you and your life choices?

Learn to spread love instead of hatred and anger. You would in return get love back.  Now everyone you attract isn't going to give you love in return and that ok. Don't become bitter because of that, for every person that doesn't treat you the way you treat them there's someone out there that would appreciate your love and kindness.

When I was volunteering at a local soup kitchen. I put this into practice and treated everybody like they were royalty because we had something in common. We were all people that have feelings in return I met some really awesome human beings. That taught me some very valuable lessons in life. Lessons I would have never learn if I never realized that I needed to humble myself.

So when I say treat people they way you want to be treated, I mean just that. If you want to be treated bad then by all means treat people the same way but no one wants to be treated bad. Let's be honest!

Love You Guys!

Petals Falling Until Next Time! xoxoxo!

Love the skin your in!.(My experience with self love)

I'm writing this because many young people have been through this growing up. For those who have never been through they simply don't seem to understand what it's like to feel alienated inside of your own skin.

Growing up, I would say that I wasn't the prettiest or had the best body in school, but I would say I was uniquely beautiful in my own way. Coming for a mother who is an extremely beautiful mixed African American woman and a father who was uniquely handsome Tanzanian man. Looking like my father I didn't look like the other children in my class. As with everything when you look different your a target for the evil comments about your appearance.

By the time I was in the third grade I started to realize that not only did I have large slanted eyes, a full bottom lip and I blessed with my father's flat nose. That I was bigger then mostly everyone else. It wasn't the lack of activity because I ran just as fast, danced just as good,  jumped just as high, and you can just say I kept up with the smaller girls. So most of my friends where smaller girls. Except for a few.

This was at the age when I started to become interested in boys and I was noticing that they looking passed me and at my friends. I think this is when I begin to pretend like it didn't bother me even though it did. This is when I began to eat my feelings. I wasn't the typical over weight girl that stuffed my face with cookie and cakes (My mother didn't really keep such things in the house) but when that moment came I binged. Being in denial saying that  I'm good I don't eat that much Monday through Saturday I only eat a lot on Sundays so I should be fine. I wasn't fine I continued to blow up.

It wasn't until 8th grade in middle school when I began to realize I wasn't the only one who was uniquely beautiful and that I should except my beauty for what it was (different) Just because I was feeling good didn't mean the name calling, little remarks, and stuff like that ended, it continued. Once I was I  High School I was able to prefect the image  of "not caring" but I use to go home and look at myself in the mirror and just be upset.  It just felt like I was just blessed with an amazing personality but very few people took the time out to show interest in knowing me.

High School was the place where I rebelled because I felt like no one understood me and when I came across those who excepted me I tend to have been a little rebellious. It was like run across a bunch of misfits for different reasons and finally feeling like you belonged. School had became a memory for me I no longer wanted to be there so I started cutting class a lot. Then eventually said to hell with school all together at the age of 16.

When I was 17 it dawned on me after being out of school for a few months that I was a drop out and decided that if I was going to fix anything in my life I was going to fix not having a diploma and enrolled in Job Corps. I remember people swearing that I couldn't do it.  That's when I can say was the first time that I did something that wasn't rebellious because people said I couldn't. I began to realize my strength during this time ( might sound crazy) but regardless of how I felt on the inside. I had just freshly turned 17, packed up my bags, and went somewhere with a bunch of people I didn't know in a location I've never been. I was without my friends (Whom I consider my family), my mother was everything, and I was at a place I couldn't run away from whenever I wanted to . A month after what was suppose to have been the beginning of  my senior started I had my diploma and that was the moment.

I stopped basing my life on what people said about me. I'm not gunna lie I still cared but I no longer let there word's define me. That's when I had a peace of mind for everyone who called me ugly, fat, stupid, dumb, and etc there was someone who said the opposite. I made it my mission to only focus on the positivity in my life. Did I continue to rebel? of course I was a teenager with very strict mother but I wasn't rebelling against myself.

Children these days have it so much worst at least when I was growing up I didn't have a Kardashian Family that the world thought everyone and their bodies should look like. I was never the one to open up about my feelings growing up but if no one tell our children that they too felt such was then like me they're going to feel alone lucky for my mom I just rebelled. Some kids actually take their lives because of this.

I started to paint my picture based on my perception of myself and no one has been able to tell me that my abstract art wasn't beautiful...

Hope this Helped Someone!

Love You Guys!

Petals Falling til Next Time! xoxoxo!

It's okay to be a Diva on a Budget

This blog is strictly for those girls that love looking good and know for a fact that it doesn't take a arm and a leg to do so theses are a few cheap things and places that I recommend for you to look your best at what ever budget that your on. I'm going keep it real though something's are worth the splurge, but the secret to having money is spending as less as possible on things you want instead of actually needing.

If your one of those girls that don't believe in spending outrageous prices just because you have it in your bank account and the item seems to be the hottest thing on the market. Here's a secret the hottest thing on the market in the summer is old news during fall. So your basically trying to keep up with the Jones for one season.

It's okay to be a diva on a budget and who the heck said being wise about what you purchase and reclaimed it as being ratchet? Ratchet is not saving it's how you carry yourself. It doesn't matter if your clothes still come from Rainbow's or your eyeliner isn't from Mac as long as you as a person carry your self a certain way any who here's the list you've been waiting for.

Makeup

BH Cosmetics: This makeup company are on the cheaper side but it's quality makeup. Well I can only speak for the eye shadows. I'm not a face makeup kind of girl but if their foundation,lip products and blush is anything like there eye shadows then they're amazing.  The best thing about this company is the sales they are constantly having sales on top of already being affordable.
Website: www.bhcosmetics.com

ELF Cosmetics: Although I haven't brought from them recently E.L.F cosmetics is also a affordable makeup site. Warning: some of the things on this site isn't what I would call amazing but truth is you expect what you pay for and some of there items are better then the price. Such as there lip glosses and face setting mist. What I personally praise them for are their cheap and single brushes. Their brushes aren't Sedona Lace are Sigma but they get the job done pretty damn well.
website: http://www.eyeslipsface.com

L.A Girl Cosmetics: I know exactly what your thinking. Isn't that the same brand from the beauty supply store and yes it is. Never sleep on beauty supply store products. L.A girl lip paints are amazing! So is there glide on eyeliner there are truly some gems within this company you never expect.
website: http://www.lagirlusa.com


Accessories and Makeup

Shop Miss A: This is one of those sites that just so happen to be a one stop for me. Why? you may ask is not only is everything a dollar, yes, I said uno peso! this is almost as close to being free as it comes but the things on here are quality items the earrings, rings, and necklaces are beautiful and the don't, I mean do- not feel like it's price. The makeup are work able (They carry ELF Cosmetics Items here too!) but one thing about this site is that you have to be quick if you see a piece you want today most likely it would be sold out the next time you go on that site.  The most amazing product on this site is their KARA eyelashes c'mon let's be real where can you find human hair eyelashes that are a dollar? and don't let me forget those flash tattoos
website: www.shopmissa.com



Born Pretty Store: I mainly come on here for nail supply items such as rhinestones and stamping plate but the jewelry on here are beauty haven't brought any from here this is sure a place to check out especially if your into nail art.
website: www.bornprettystore.com

Hair

For those who don't know I do where wigs. I use to be a braid wearing going up. Wore track weaves a few times and now since I love the versatility of wearing wigs when I switched its hard for me to switch back. Many women these days buy there virgin hair and make there wigs. There's nothing wrong with that some of those wigs make my a little envious until I see the prices of those bundles though. More power to the woman that can spend close to $200.00 a bundle and have like 4 of them with a closure I'm sorry I can do a lot with $1,000 dollars then to just sew it on my head.
To some of ya'll that aren't close to a beauty supply store like myself or even if your looking for a price comparison this is for you guys.

Hair to Beauty: This site has been my holy grail since last year every unit I've receive have came super fast and there affordable. Yes they do carry weave, braiding hair, accessories and makeup as well just think of them as a online version on your favorite beauty supply store.
website: www.hairtobeauty.com

Elevate Styles: Now let me tell you about this company they are slowly stealing my heart away this happens to be my mother's holy grail for her units they are a couple of days faster is shipping they just seem to carry some units at a cheap price then hair to beauty problem is by the time I'm on a unit the color I want it gone and I'm not ready to go 100% black or dark brown I need color in my hair to bring out the undertones in my complexion. If your looking for a one stop for hair and accessories this is strictly just a hair site. They do carry weaves and braiding hair. Your orders are also protected by google which I find impressive.
website: www.elevatestyles.com

Closing Statement

These are just a few sites for you guys to check out and I would definitely keep you guys posted with out things that I buy from these site. Keep in mind that you should do comparisons at all times check for proof of the legitimacy of the site. Make sure the shipping doesn't make up half of your entire order for example: If your buying a item for let's say $40 dollars and standard shipping is $20.00 don't buy it that's bull crap shipping should cost that much if it is the same country and you know for a fact the item doesn't weight that much. Now sometimes when you spend $50 dollars or more on these site you automatically get free shipping so read the fine print. Chances are standard shipping is $8.00 anyway so why not get something else for it instead of spending it solely on shipping. Ebay and Amazon do carry cosmetics but be aware that most of the time its a vender saling  through these sites so take caution. There have been claims about fake high end makeup and scammers floating around these sites.  Come up a price that you don't really mind losing in case something goes wrong and start shopping for things in that price range. For me that $7.00, I'm just going to by honest by the time it get to $10.00 I'm looking like what else can I get with this besides makeup or accessories this could be a boom ass shirt or a pack of meat (which is becoming even more pricey by the day) then I start thinking about holiday gifts. I do consider anything over $10.00 a splurge simply because its on something I want instead of something I needed. The purpose of this blog is to let some of your divas out there that you don't have to spend a load of cash to look good. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being a "Diva on a Budget"

Hope This Helps Someone!

Love you guys!

Petal Falling til Next Time! xoxox!!!!!

Does it seems like "Your Moment" is taking way too long?

Many of us get into a runt of trying to make other people proud. It’s normal we have a lot of people wanting to see us succeed in life. This is sometimes the reason why we set our standards so high when it comes to our lives. We often times feel like we aren’t doing enough because someone else always seems to be doing better than we are and in world where success is limited to material things not having stability can make us feel like failures in life. We tend to forget that everyone has their time, never to lose faith, and keep on pushing when those around you seem to push you down. If you feel like your moment is just taking to long to get here, hopefully this would help you keep it together when you don’t see that light at the end of the tunnel.

Everyone has their own time. You have to realize that life is unpredictable and just because it’s raining in the morning doesn’t mean that it’s going to be raining all day long. We all have good times but how do we know what good if we never go through the bad? There’s a balance of them both and without those struggles can you imagine how you would end up? I know it sounds crazy but my struggles in life have taught me to be humble. I was never a mean person but let’s just say I took a lot of things for granted until I was placed in a situation where I had to do without them. Not only did I learn to improvise but the value of those things really projected as I started to miss them being right there. So instead of being negative in your situation or beating yourself up being Cindy down the street that’s the same age as you seem to be more accomplished. Take the time that you’re in your struggle to evaluate your life. What do you need to learn from your situation, Who should you let into your circle during this situation, and What survival skills should you pick up while improvising? The most important thing is to study yourself throughout our lives we tend to pay so much attention to everyone around us. Our friends, family, co-workers, classmates, and the list goes on we focus so much on others when being left by ourselves we often find out that we are a familiar strangers.

Never lose faith no matter what happens. We all know the feeling of applying for jobs and it seems like your phones isn’t ringing as frequently or quickly as you hoped it would. It’s discouraging especially when it seems like all your peers are employed and your still pounding the pavement without success. Don’t give up on your goals whatever your goals maybe. It might not be a job it can be starting an online business, meeting the woman/man of your dreams, attending church more often, losing those 50 pounds that seem to always be at the top of your resolutions at the beginning of every New Year. You have to stay positive and carry on because trust me there’s going to already be enough negativity in your life.

Which brings me to the next topic. Those people around you that call themselves having your “best interest” at heart. People can be so negative at times. During my struggles adapting to a new environment I naturally wanted to work and save up so I can return back home and soon discovered that without transportation in a rural environment you’re screwed. I didn’t have a car and couldn’t afford to pay someone $15 dollars a day for gas money not talking about them expected extra stuff on the side just for taking me somewhere. I was stuck in a situation where I really couldn’t do anything. Instead of people offering to take to look for a job or enroll in school they rather walk around talking about “You need to get your s*** together”, “What’s wrong with you, why can’t you get a job?, “You just don’t want to do s***” and my favorite “You need to get a crazy check”. I’m not going to even lie it got to me and mentally tore me down and broke me into piece. I was angry for a long time with everything I almost lost it. That’s why I’m telling you to shake those darts off. The people around you can literally cause more damage to you when you aren’t what they consider successful. Think I’m lying? I bet you had more friends when everything was good and only have a few if any now that things are a little harder. You have to sometimes dislocate yourself from negativity and it’s everywhere.

The question I often have when it comes to expectations on young adults is who told us that if we don’t have our own car, house, and bank accounts filled with loads of money by 25 that we are failures. Who set those standards for us? Many people feel like if they don’t accomplish these things by a certain age they’re worth less. Some have committed suicide and others have turned to illegal hustles trying to keep up with the Jone’s. When all you have to do is keep the faith, be humble, shake off negativity, and keep trying the same way it’s happening for someone else it would happen for you too.

 

Love You Guy! XoXo!

Petals Falling Until Next Time!

 

Is it hard for you to forgive? Maybe this would help.

 

A lot of times when someone has hurt us. We tend to carry that hurt around as unwanted baggage. We become bitter to the thought of letting that person back into our lives and in many case wish misfortunate upon that person because we are so angry. Sitting around thinking of a way to get that person back for what they have done to you or praising because karma has worked her magic.

Bring back memories huh? What if I told you that forgiveness is not for them but for you? Truth be told a lot of times we are hurt and angry about something that happened in the past and that person probably don’t even have a clue that your holding a grudge against them. They’re living their lives happy and your stuck because you have simply allowed them to steal your happiness.

When a person can control how you feel causing you not enjoy the days you have on this earth. They have control over you without even knowing. No one should have the power to make you avoid anything, and when we carry baggage we tend to avoid situations where we would run into that person. We would ask questions like “Is he/she going to be there? If so I don’t want to be caught in the same location with that person”. That’s not how you should live your life. Believe it our not the best thing you can do for your self is to forgive.

Forgiveness is the best revenge. Being kind to a person who have harmed you. Rather it was verbally, mentally, physically, or emotionally would baffle them more then being bitter towards them. You have to realize that everyone has hurt someone in the past including you. Sometimes people feel bad for the hurt they have caused. So forgive them and let it go after all you want those you have harmed to forgive you.

Tips on How to be a Writer Chick or Gent!!!

Tips on How to be a  Writer Chick or Gent!!!

(The Story Edition)

It's only fair that I do a mini run down on my writing timeline. I started writing in the sense of a hobby when I was 12 years old. My english teacher at the time Mr. Jackson encouraged his students to write being that he was an author himself. That's when the will to write poetry was born in me. Starting off it was little preteen poems about my middle school crush and then one day I decided to write a script. I don't remember the name of the script itself but the characters are vivid in my memory still.

So my first tip of being a writer is to get to know your characters. Sit down and plan out the basics of your main characters decide whether  your main characters are the good guys or the bad guys. For I good story I suggest that the main characters are always the protagonist because like with the Batman Saga or any other saga that bad guys or the antagonist could change around multiple times in a story well your protagonist stays the same. Back to the basic character blueprint. Figure out who is each character (Name Them) , What is the position they play in your story, What is their personality, The fun part is when you determine their physical characteristics.

In my first script the main characters were Latia and Quame'. Latia was a normal flashy teenage girl with the world at her finger tips. Except she basically lived on her own in secret. Quame was the quiet brother of the bunch "The one that was often over looked" until he met Latia. It was a typical "Teenage Love Affair Type of Story" but the back drop of the whole story was urban. The dialogue, The scenery, and The style was all urban. The next thing that is important if you want to write a story is  your scenery  or as I say is your backdrop. You can write a "Teenage Love Affair" type of story but is doesn't have to be urban. It could as well be Victorian or  Contempary  its all in the backdrop. I suggest you get imaginative with scenery. I choose to stick to my urban roots because the urban audience is growing yet it isn't in high demand as compared to Horror, Mysteries, and Romance. Although you can very well write either one with an urban backdrop Urban Fiction is Considered Urban Fiction.

My second story was written my freshman year in High School. I was a more mature story the Name of this Story was "The Playa's Game" After you have the first two main things in order next thing to do is to create a title. Your title should scream "Read Me" but at the same time your title should go with the story. If your title your story "The Blue Orca" people are expecting that your writing about a whale or something to do with the Ocean or Something else along the line of an Orca (You can get real creative with the word Orca)  yet your whole story is about "Yellow Butterflies" your readers would  be at a lost. 

"The Playa's Game" was basically about a promiscuous young woman "Latryva" who gets in a relationship with an equally promiscuous rapper "Lays" and they go through the changes of trying to be faithful to one another (A story filled with sex scene) I was a teenager what more can I say but those who glance through a few pages ended up reading those pages as well and requested to read more and more of anything I wrote. As a writer it is important to keep your reader in mind as your write your stories, Your reader would be the ones who make are break you when it comes to your writing career.

 Start by creating a fan base, which means you are going to do a lot for free demos for your readers but make sure that just in case you hit a pot of gold and your demo version falls in the right hands that it can be trace back to you as the author. Ways to do this, Write them in a Blog everything published on your blog is yours ,you are known as the author of the material you publish on your blog, If you decide to write them on social media I suggest that you leave it unfinished in away where you can only be the one to continue it (This doesn't mean much but it can prove to some people that your twisted mind created it originally).

It took years upon years and story upon story many that haven't even been seen by any one to get my writing to the way it is today and still. Toffee and Nasty (Characters from The Hood Opera" can agree that I need some more improvement which means. If writing is something your really want to do now or in the future. Practicing your skill will always be a must and the more you practice the better you would get.

I am not an expert but I have been a writer for years. No I haven't published anything when I write what I think is a best seller I would but for now I hope this get you started.
Remember that everyone has a best seller in them! Mwahs!

Love You Guys!


Petals Falling Until Next Time! XOXO!

For the Fellas! Relationship Advice from a Woman's Point of View

For starters let me start off by saying " I know you guys didn't think that I was just going to come for my ladies" If you did then your wrong. This in no way is trying to bash the male race but I guess both sexes can agree with the fact that we can't really live without the other although we can't understand each other. So instead of making general statements about men I would categorize some things because I am aware of the fact that every guy isn't the same. (Let's Get Into It)

Some of you guys have a bad habit of flashing the success you have by showing off and bragging. Are you aware of the fact that just like with everything else money bring fakeness around you, but somewhere in the minds of many men they mistake the love they gain from women that never paid the attention before the money rolled in as love. Well it's not, I have seen many guys have the little trophy  they flashed to the world and as soon as challenges come those little trophy's walk right out the picture. A lot of those times there's a woman who truly care about them as a person that they over looked yet every time they fall she's there. Wouldn't have been easier on their pockets and their heart in general if they rocked it out with the woman who wanted them when they had absolutely nothing? At least then they would know that she would be there through thick or thin, and put in work with them . So if by chance they lose everything she can pick them  back up. I don't get it, is it really that important to have a brainless bimbo that have good looks on your arm when you have the sweeter things in life. Instead of sticking to the chick that been there and spoiling her with your riches?

Ok, This one is for those Players or those guys who don't know that they are  a player but for some reason find that it's ok to have a woman and mess around with someone else beside her.  Stop it the things that doesn't effect you guys as men  effect us as women. Most of us are vulnerable coming into a relationship with you. Chances are that if she's even talking to you, she saw something within you that she didn't see in any other guy. We women sacrifice so much to be with the guy that we have feelings for and for them to play "Let Me See If I Can Trick Two" is a slap in the face. Some of you guys even have the audacity to be like "She Crazy" when she black out on you. As a woman the simple thought of my sacrifices not keeping you away from common hoes. Can make you go crazy. You guys should know. The moment that a girl your serious about cheat on you. How do you feel? Well we feel the same way but 10x more because women are emotional beings.

Now this if for the guys in the relationships that seem to take some things for granted.
Give your ladies some compliments, make her feel special and etc. Look at your girl the next time you see her. Is her hair laid? Nails look good? Makeup to Perfection? Is her Face Clear? Does she look good if her Outfit? Does she Smell Good? Give her a compliment pulling yourself together is a lot of hard work and this is coming from a woman so I know. We women have often wished to have been men because you guys have it so easy compared to us in this department. We literally wax our eyebrows, almost blind ourselves with eyeliner, but glue in our hair or a perm, and acrylic on our fingers just to "Remain the same chick you fell in love with" and you can even acknowledge it? C'mon now seriously? and for those I like my girls natural type of guys. It still takes a lot of work to keep natural from looking un-kept. Tell her she look good. Slap her booty like ya'll still in high school. Like I told the ladies, continue to do the things you did to get her. Don't get sloppy nor funky. I say this for all the ladies of this world "We love a Good Smelling Man" none of us what to hug musk (Off topic but the truth)

Also listen to your woman. A woman who loves you would never advise you wrong. Some guys have a bad habit of listening to their male friends over their woman. Your "Homies, Bros, and Partners in Crime) in some case aren't who they seem to be and would trip you up faster then anyone else, but your woman wants to see you do your best in life she would never do such a thing.

Hope this Helped Someone.


Love You Guys!

Petals Falling Until Next Time! XOXO!

The Outcome of HeartBreak (My Experience)

Many people don't realize what they do when they do someone wrong in a relationship. I have been hurt deeply and it's not the fact of what that person did that hurt me. It's the aftermath of knowing that what I thought I meant to that person was so wrong. The fact that after all that happened that they couldn't at least have been real with me. The fact I caught feeling I can admit was my fault because I knew better but this  "Foolish Heart" of mine.

 I'm sharing this because as always  I am  prefect example of what of some of the things I write about. Heartbreak is no different this is just a run through of what the aftermath could do to someone.

 

I haven't been able to talk to another without feel that they would hurt me emotionally.
When you break someones heart you have to keep in mind that your telling that person that they aren't good enough. That no matter how much they could love you that it meant nothing to you.
I have officially been able to except the fact that it wasn't me who lost in that situation but they did.
It took a while and sometimes it still bothers me that the one time I let my guard down. Was the one time I should've kept it up. I went through the motions of trying to figure out what it was about me that they didn't what, what was wrong with my love. Is it that I was foolish to fall for what now seems to be stupid reasons but at the moment it felt so right, and now it hurts to realizes that only I felt that way.

 I would ask myself is it possible that at one point it wasn't just me,that maybe he felt those feelings to. Then I would think if so then what happened to turn him away from me.

 Ladies and Gentlemen I'm telling you "Don't blame yourself because someone over looked you".
Think about your future and how being with that person would've changed you. Ask your self " If I would've gotten what I so longed for back then would I truly be happy now"?.
It would amaze you of the answers you come up with. For me I saw myself as being contented with life,  forgetting my personal goals, being a mom without a commitment. Probably cheated on constantly, because I didn't have his heart.

I understand that  now, being on the other side of a similar situation I can see his point of view on the whole thing.

Someone could love you and be the right one for you but if your heart isn't their then it just isn't.

I can't blame him for that, As a matter of fact he faked a lot of things with me but for not faking love I am grateful  because  I deserve someone who loves me! Not someone who pretends to love me because I love them and would treat them good. They would never stay true to you if the heart isn't there and it's unfair for them to miss out on true love just because you loved them better.

 Before you decide to do someone wrong, think about what your actually doing. Its better to be real with that person when it comes to feelings then to lead them on. After all thats all it takes in order for a person to start moving on!

 

Hope this Helped Someone

 

Love You Guys!

 

Petals Falling Until Next Time! XOXO!

Sex and Love: Why the Act or Love is Done, Without the Emoitions of Love! (Updated Version)

Love is an emotion that at everyone at some point experience.  Can you be in a relationship with someone your in love with, without sex? Let's say that something happened to your parthner and you can no longer (Get Down) Would you leave or Step on that person? This question is often one I ponder upon and my answer is In no way should sex or the lack of be the reason you throw away someone you truly love.! See love itself is a strong emotion, One that is often uncontrollable it could cause Kings to forfeit their kingdoms and Good Girls to disobey their parents. True Love can fight through anything, but it is rare to find a striving relationship without sex.

 Sex is a different story though and for both men and women we tend to feel different about sex. Sex is an act based on physical attraction or urges. For guys its both but its more frequent. Guys literally wake up thinking about sex, throughout the day think about sex, and goes to sleep thinking about sex. Whether it's who they want to bone, how they're gonna get lucky that day, past sexual encounters and etc. So some arent  as picky about thier partners.Women are a bit different we think about sex too, but less frequently and its based on attraction to the guy our something he has that we want so we are less likely to except just any partner to satisfy our urges. Keep in mind I'm speaking of average men and women, not promiscuous beings or thots that screw carelessly.

 Some people get love and sex confused believe it our not some people actually believe that you have to be in love with a person in order to have sex with that person, some people actually believe that sex would win over someone elses heart.  Just because he or she may say sweet things or do acts of love in order to get you in bed. Does not mean they actually love you. A person thats in love with you would not just show love when they expect to get something in return.

 Ladies you know, That guy that only contact you at booty call hours to confess so much love for you and somehow the conversation turns into sex talk. He isn't in love with you. He might love you as a person, but he doesnt love you enough to make you an honest woman.

Guys you know that girl thats only wide open for you and loves you when you got things together.  That girl is mainly after your possessions instead of whats in your heart. Moral of the story sex is used for many things these days. It's no longer just an act of love. If emotions aren't involved then sex is sex! You can not win someones heart with it and those who believe they can only set themselves up for heatbreak and other emotional issues.

I'm not saying don't have sex, but I am saying to be aware that many time sex is just that. So look at the whole picture before your heart decides to do that stupid thing it likes to do and jump into into it shouldn't. Also if you really what want the guy or girl on a emotional level. Hold out for awhile the chase is more impressive then actually doing a complete home run. Make that person put in that werk for it! I know guys it would be harder for ya'll but you can do it the whole time your holding out study the person of interest and maybe you'll realize how lucky you are you didn't let them go all the way.  Emotionless sex is how some unwanted Baby Mommas and Baby Daddies are created.

Hope this helped someone and it was a bunch of babble because I admit to revising and old blog before I delete my old page.


Love You Guys!


Petals Falling Until Next Time! XOXO!