Monday, October 12, 2015

The Power of Self Belief

The Power of Self Belief


In life they're many decisions that we as growing individuals would decide to make. Rather those decisions are to start your own business, chase your dream, change your body image, or whatever your thing would make life better for you.

During these times in our lives we would realize that those around us aren't as supportive as we thought they would be or some are just down right discarding your ambitions because they don't believe you can achieve certain goals within your life.

You have to also realize that at the end of the it doesn't matter what those people think but how you view yourself. If you believe that you can do it no one and their negativity should be able to discourage you.

For every negative view on your dreams. It should be another spark within you that make you what to fight harder to achieve them. However, I'm not saying that you should disregard positive criticism. Which would only come from critics that what to see you grow and become better.

This is were you have to be able to tell the difference between positive criticism and straight disrespect on your trade it's simple but can be confusing. A person who is a positive critic would never tell you to quit but suggest ways you can approve (One short way to tell the difference). Even with this you have to believe in your self enough to determine rather you agree with their advice are not.

Sorry, I got off topic a bit!

Anywho, never let the lack of love towards your dream or the amount of time it takes for you to accomplish your dreams hinder you from pursuing them further. 

There's are going to be many times where people aren't going to see your vision. Times where they would classify those visions as nonsensical or immature. Times where it seems like time is running out or your becoming to old to accomplish these goals and dreams

Don't believe the lies from the enemy lingering in your mind. Keep your faith, hope, and you drive to reach for your personal stars no matter how far away they may seem! If you haven't started to reach for those stars because of other people views on them. Then start them today! Stop waiting for a fan base and other people to believe in you.

Hope this helped someone!

Love You Guys! xoxoxo!

Petals Falling Until Next Time!


Sunday, October 11, 2015

Jayson: Chapter Three: Opening the Gate




The ride to the house was a quiet one. Sina and Azania looked at each other like they were crazy for letting complete strangers come inside their home. Have their complete boredom have gotten to them so much that they forgot the first rule of an educated adult?

“So how do you guys like it here so far”?  Sapphire asked breaking the awkward silence.

Azania turned around smirking “It’s ite ,boring ass fuck but it’s cool, not used to this peaceful shit though”.

Maurice smiled back at her but frowned as they pulled into the drive way. It was almost has if he knew what awaited him but it was forbidden to speak about it.

“Looks a lot different since the last time we been here” Penelope said as her eyes roamed the  driveway.

“It really does” Emerald said as she started to shake as she stepped out of the car. Abigail walked over to her sister handing her a thick sweater. Sapphire stared at Emerald realizing it was to soon to freak out in front of Sina and Azania.  However, Roses always made Emerald weak like they physically sucked the power out of her.  She was the only Blackwilt in generations that struggled with this allergy since their Great Great Grand Mother Effy.

Azania plopped on the couch waiting for all the adventure Maurice was talking about in the club. When Emerald passed out on the floor the upon entering through their front door. The Blackwilts then surrounded her in a circle chanting something then touching her until she rose in the air spinning around and around in a circle. Maurice yelled some funny word causing Emerald whole body to jerk back until she landed back on the floor. Azania was now on her feet as well “WHAT KINDA HOCUS POCUS SHIT WAS THAT”! she yelled as Emerald shook off  the tension and they all walked towards Sina and Azania. “This is the reason we were outcast” Sapphire said holding her head down afraid of what would happen next.

“So if your family were outcast for being witches and warlocks that makes us…? Maurice cut Sina off as he stood in front of them all.

“You have to come into your powers to know if it was passed down to you, as of now your just regular people”

The room then turned silence again. As Azania jumped up putting her hands on her wide hips.

“Ya’ll niggas here to help open that damn gate in the garden and show us this dungeon” she said grabbing Maurice by the arm.

He smiled finally realizing that their revelation didn’t affect how the girls saw him our his family. Sina jump in agreement as everyone else followed Maurice’s lead outside.



The door to the dungeon was on the far back side of the house camouflaged by a grandmother willow tree. Azania and Sina looked at each other as if it was their first time noticing the obvious. Sapphire touched the lock “Open up and let us see what you keep in secret under the tree” she chanted as she pulled the lock off opening the door.

“Everyone turn on your flash light” Maurice said as there wasn’t a speck of light to be seen.

It was what seemed to be 100 steep stone steps that lead almost what felt like 6 feet under the house.  There was an ire feeling attached to being down there. It was as if someone was watching them although there wasn’t any stories attached to this dark place.  Emerald switched on the main light illumining the whole dungeon that was just bare.

“Mr. Wilson use to hold all his liquor down here” Abigail said answering the silent questions Azania had been asking herself.

“The key to the gate is down here though” Maurice said confirming that this little trip wasn’t just for fun.

Sapphire circled the front area until see saw a crack in the wall she then popped out the brick hiding the key behind it.

“Ya’ll ready to see what behind the gate? She asked swinging the key in the air.

“You bitches could’ve just hocus pocused that shit open” Azania said rolling her eyes as they started picking up their flashlights, turned off the main light and started climbing back up the stairs.  As Sina climbed out the door she looked back realizing the light was back on and she saw him. The man in the window staring back at her with his finger on his heart shaped lips as if he was telling her not to say anything.

            Standing in the rose garden Azania was over joyed as the key was inserted into the gate she jumped up and down as the door open. Sapphire stared at her puzzled so did Maurice, Emerald, Penelope, and Abigail as they all took turns peeking inside. Sina pointed and froze before fainting. Azania then took a deep breath look inside the place she have been dying to crack open since day one and even she couldn’t find the words to say about what she saw…

…To Be Continued…

Start  A Conversation With Me…

  • What do you think in behind that gate?
  • Why do you think Jayson is only appearing to Sina?



Tuesday, October 6, 2015

You are not your mistakes!




Mistakes are very well something that every living human being or creature in general have experienced. We have all made them, they are those things that we learn and grow from. As children some of us had to write many lowercase "d's " before realizing that they weren't lowercase "b's" or we had to fall a few times before realizing that we should step over that "crooked crack in the side walk" instead of tripping on it. These mistakes never classified us as being stupid or clumsy children. So why is it that a few bad choices in our adolescences and early adulthood automatically paint a picture of who we are in the minds of fellow human beings?

Maybe some of us were more experimental sexually at an early age. That shouldn't be the sole reason that we are branded as being "A Hoe" "A Slut" or "Promiscuous" for our entire lives. Spending years trying to clear up your reputation (we all have one) only for some people to still classify you as such. For another example : Say you were (for lack of a better word) a thug. You was all about that street life. The drug dealing, gun slinging, lick hitting (robbery for those who don't know) and hoe selling (pimping) but you have changed your ways and aiming for a better more honest life. It's wrong for someone to classify you as a "Thug" when your trying to become a better man or woman.

You have to understand that some people tend to hold on to your pass as away to keep you in bondage. You could be a young woman who was recently engaged to the love of your life  and one of his homeboys that so happen to have known you during a certain period in your life could simply say "You can't turn a hoe into a house wife". You then find your self battling with those words to prove that you are worthy enough for true happiness all because of someone else perception of you based off of your mistakes. Rather you realize it our not his homeboy now have you in captivity trying to secure something that's suppose to already be yours, simply because he says you don't deserve it.

In contrary say your a young man struggling to make ends meet, but your comfortable in life. You have learned that you rather struggle and live a fulfilling straight and narrow life, but you past seems to follow you. Some criticize you for being responsibly broke (Having money to up keep your self but not living glamorous) your close friends never fail to remind you of how you lived your life. Some even encourage you to get back into it by make you feel worthless by saying  "He's a bum " "He ain't ish"  and etc. All because you decided to do things the right way and now you find yourself in a battle to prove that "The Hood Life" wasn't you but a phase you were going through

People tend to use others past mistakes as away to define them. You have to be able to realize that you are not your mistakes. As a matter of fact don't be ashamed of your mistakes from the get go. Only you know what your reasons where to do such things and sometimes even though our mistakes are partially our fault there are other players in it as well and those that condemn you do it on the bases of hearing a one sided story.

For the lack of a better example: Say that you met a guy and both of you establish a in a lovely relationship, but you know something isn't right.Later, you find out that you where the "Mistress" "Side Chick" or etc. People are now classifying you as a "Home Wrecker" without even considering the fact that you were being played too. It was your mistake because you should've walked away or confronted him when things didn't feel right. However, he was the one lying to the both of you and to save his own ass he decided to make it seem as if you were the one in the wrong by saying you were "Crazy" "Obsessed" "Delusional" and etc. Now he's classified as the good guy and your the pyscho chick.

You are not your mistakes. However, your mistakes have made you who you are today. If it wasn't for you being a "Wild" teenager you wouldn't know that you should carry your self differently now. If it wasn't for your failed relationships you wouldn't know that you deserve better. If it wasn't for your hangover you wouldn't know that you should drink in moderation and the list goes on.

Embrace being human, and never let anyone hold your mistakes over you as a way of crippling who you're destined to become.

I hope this helped someone!

Petals Falling Until Next Time!
Love You Guys! xoxo!

Monday, October 5, 2015

When Should You Let Go?


Sometimes letting go of something is the hardest thing for us to do. Rather it's a person, a item, or a situation. However, in order to grow they're somethings we have to part ways with.

We tend to hold on to people based on our past relationship with that person. We don't realize that what once made that relationship strong has faded away and as human being we constantly have hope that things would go back to the way they use to be. You have to understand that some individuals aren't meant to stay in our life forever. Like the saying goes "Some people are in you life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime". Discovering what purpose a person served within your life is crucial when trying to figure out if you should keep them around.

 When I was a teenager I was very rebellious during that period in my life I met a lot of people. Some were people that would hold a position in my life for the long haul and somewhere just there for the moment. When reflecting back on past friendships. I began to realize that most of my friends were gained through the carefree and wild attitude I once had and now that I'm more mature and conduct myself differently those people and myself no longer have anything in common. Which make it obvious that being a rebel was the glue that stuck us together and over the years that glue have lost it's tackiness.

Signs you need to let go..!

  • If you are in any sort of a relationship with a person and you feel drained. No relationship should make you feel exhausted after being around that person. Now I'm meaning this as a recurrent feeling from being around this person not just a single occasion.
  • If you have to prepare yourself to deal with that individual in a negative way . For Example: Say you and your home girl Keisha are planning to meet up later and you dread it to your soul, because Keisha just seem to carry around bad energy and you just know your gonna have a headache after being around her. So you make sure your either not sober upon linking up or have your turn up in a close range.( Simply because you going to need it before the night is over)
  • If that person seems to low key diss you all the time. We have all had that friend you know that friend that for whatever reason can't compliment you without throwing in some shady ish. They say things like "Girl that dress is cute but that stomach tho" or " I see you in college now, if you didn't play around you would've been done" There's a thin line between being blunt and throwing shade.
  • If that person act and treat you like you're beneath them.
  • If you find your self in a competition all the time with that person.
  • If that person make empty promises all that time. For Example: I once had a friend that would promise the moon and the sky and me being a silly billy I trusted her to come through when she said she would and every time she never did. However, she managed to be reliable when it came to everyone else. It didn't take long before our conversations became non-existing.
  • If a person is hindering your personal growth.
  • If a person tends to classify you by the mistakes you made in your past. Just because you made those mistakes doesn't mean that you deserve to be labeled according to them. (Check Out Tomorrows Blog for this topic)
  • If that person just don't fit in your life anymore.
This list could go on forever but let's be honest we all know when a person have wore out their welcome in our lives. Moving on with your life is okay! Don't feel guilty for doing so.

Let me clarify somethings. Just because your letting those people go doesn't mean you do not care about them. In many cases if that person makes you feel a certain way. Than chances are you, yourself isn't sunshine and apple pie within their lives either. For the same reason your holding on they maybe holding on too. You just might have to be the one to break the bondage between the two of you in order for the both of you to flourish. Be honest with that person let them know how you feel and if there's room for changes. If you and that person could work on it then do so! For Example: Tell Keisha she carries bad energy and you feel drain when around her, Keisha may not recognize this herself and try to change because of your honesty, Improving your friendship with her in the long run. Now, when I say let go I mean it in the sense of loving that person from a distance and if there's value in that relationship then that bond would never actually break.

I really hoped this made sense (In didn't prewrite this one) and helped someone.

Love You Guys! XOXO!

Petals Falling Until Next Time!

Sunday, October 4, 2015

Jayson: Chapter 2 (The Blackwilts)

The night was almost as similar as the day. Sina tossed and turned until her back ran raw. She couldn't get the image of the man she saw in the window out of her head. There was absolutely no way she was just seeing things and in some weird way she was regretting telling Azania about it. Like she should've kept him her little secret and by calling her sister's attention to it she would want to experience the site of him too.
He chiseled cheek bones and those hazel green eyes just pierced her soul as if they where summoning her to come close and like always she ran. In every situation she ran like she was running from Uche right now. She knew that one day he would find her and had no idea of what would come of it. He might actually kill her this time being that he use to come so close,only pulling back once it dawned on him that he actually had a ounce of feelings for her. It seemed so unfair for her to endure so much at such an young age but she did it so Azania wouldn't have to. So she would have a chance at a life that she didn't have and being with Uche made that possible.
Sina got out of the bed running her feet against the cold marble floors. She never had luxurious things but she was beginning to enjoy them. She yawned opening her window and spotted Azania trying to pull open that gate in the garden for the 100th time since they moved in a week ago. Sina threw on her robe dashing out the back door.
"Damnit leave that gate alone" Sina yelled startling her sister .
"Uggh, Sina you made me lose it" Azania yelled stomping her foot.
"Lose what"! Sina screamed back.
"The crack I made between the wall in the door" Azania said plopping down.
"We been here long enough to get out the house and out meet some people, you and that gate about to drive me fucking crazy" Sina yelled causing Azania to laugh.
"You sound like momma and look like daddy when you play angry" Sina rolled her eyes.
She hated any references that compare her to her mother. The last thing she wanted to hear was she was like her mother in any way.
"Lighten the fuck up, we really do needa be around other people besides each other. Azania said walking towards the house.
Roseboro, North Carolina was a small town with the population of 1,000. It was the kind of place that you envision when thinking about retiring in your old age. Everything was beautiful yet slow paced and quiet it was a wonder how the youth managed to have fun in such a place.
The Weeknd "I can't feel my face" chimed through the radio speakers.
"Its going down at Club Amethyst tonight" The DJ announced causing Sina to jump up in excitement.
"We def in there tonight" She yelled at Sina from the bathroom as Azania ransack her closet pulling out her black lace bodycon dress and black pumps. She was ready for some male attention and she was making sure that she was going to get some that night. Pinning her cherry red curly hair behind her left ear and lightly washing neutral shaded eyeshadow on her eyes. She might have been overlooked back home but this was her home now and she was going to make a name for herself.
Club Amethyst was more then both girls had expected.
"This damn sure ain't no hole in the wall" Sina said as she admired the purple velvet lounge sections and glass tile floor. For the first time sense they moved they actually felt like they was at home.
"Damn what the fuck ya'll looking at" Azania yelled at a group of girls who apparently wasn't appreciating the sight of new competition.
"Azania, stop it we came here to make friends not enemies" Sina grabbed her sister leading her to the nearest lounge area sitting down. Some tall mahogany brown skin girl walked over sitting across from them.
"Don't mind them, you two must be the heiress to "The Everlasting Rose" mansion".
"Yea, how you know" Sina said sliding over in the chair.
"Small town, I'm Sapphire by the way and those are my sisters Abigal, Penelope, and Emerald. Sapphire said motioning them to come over.
"We are the Blackwilt sisters" They all said in unsion.
"I'm Azania and this is my sister Sina" Azania said throwing her hand out.
"And we are the Wilson sisters" Sina said as she started to shake the hands of the girls across from them.
Emerald switched in her sit throwing her long black hair over her shoulders. As Penelope eyes widened.
"Wilson sisters!" Abigal said with such excitement. Causing Azania to peered at her strangely.
"We have heard so much about you two" Emerald said winking her eyes as Sapphire motioned for her to shut up.
"Your Grandmother and mines were best friends, we are happy to finally meet the girls we heard so much about" Sapphire said as she motioned the waitress for some drinks.
"Let's fill you in about this place, They're only 50 women and 54 men in our age group here. This is where we hang out this is our side of town the other side. Is Lilith ,NC which is mainly whites and conservative blacks this is the side of those that the rest of society didn't want. We are the misfits. Our ancestors were outcast here and made this our own everything you see here is ours." Emerald said grabbing a glassing of red wine off the platter.
Sina laughed "Outcast, Misfit, you gotta be fucking kidding me" she said in between chuckles.
"It's true, Sina" Some tall light man with tattoos said sliding in the lounge section.
"How the fuck you know my name" Sina went off standing up.
"Sit down, I'm Maurice a Blackwilt, have you seen ..." Maurice was ssshed by Sapphire.
"Have we seen what"? Azania said staring at all of them.
"They haven't even opened the gate yet" Penelope muttered
"Don't get her started with that damn gate" Sina said rolling her eyes.
"The gate"! Azania yelled in excitement "I knew that something was special about that gate,but I can't get it open!"
"you have to find the key first, it should be in the dungeon" Maurice said gazing at Azania.
"There's a dungeon to our house" Sina said in totally shock.
"Let's go see if we can open it together" Sapphire said as she tipped the waitress.
......to be continued....
Start a Conversation with me?
.Who do you think the Blackwilt are?
.Why do you think their ancestors were outcast?
.What do you think is in the gate?

Saturday, October 3, 2015

Roses on a Budgets (Nail Art Junkie Edition)


Many of you may know that nail art is becoming a trend. There are more and more shows about nails and even more techniques popping up.
For a nail enthusiast like myself it could become extremely diffcult to keep up with these trends without breaking the bank and sometimes waiting forever for those packages from over seas to arrive with those rhinestones and studs you've been dying to try is just to much.
What if I told you guys that there was a site where nail art trends are just $1 dollar each.  They carry studs, pearls,  chunky glitter, laser wire, foil, and so much more.
I was so thrilled to have found this site www.dollarnailart.com (the name says it all)  it's any nail geeks dream site.

Instructions/Ideas

Chunky Glitters: 

  • Chunky glitters are very versatile you can layer them over a thin layer of acrylic then encapsulate them with clear acrylic and top coat them with gel or top coat for a glassy design.
  • Add them in glitter mixes to use with acrylic or gel
  • Add a few pieces over your painted nails for at extra pop
  • Cover your whole nail with it over your top coat

Studs:

  • Studs can be used for an edgy look on your nails you can arrange them in many different ways over gel or nail glue to make your manicure look like your a rock star.

Laser Wire:

  • This is one of those things that really look amazing encapsulate in gel or acrylic. If you not in to those products you can get away with placing them on tacky nail polish/nail glue and coat them with a thick top coat. (Looks like a science project on your hands)

Nail Foil:

  • This is one of those nail art things that saves you a lot of work but still looks amazing. All you have to do is apply the glue, it would be milky but wait until it turns clear. Press on the foil quickly then pull is up for cool effects. Top with clear top coat/gel top coat for shine and protection.

Here are some of the things I got from them:
Studs!
Sequins or Chunky Glitter
Stars or Chunky Glitter
A lot of studs and Chunky Glitter
  
Nail Foil
  It really doesn't have to be costly for your nails to look amazing!
Here are some rough designs I came up with:
Ice Box Heart
I encapsulated blue sequins and hearts in gel
toping it with a clear heart 3d nail piece.

Gold Tribal
I placed a stripe of foil gel down the middle.
Add the nail foil.
Encapsulated with gel
Added a few rhinestones

Black Glass
I add black sequins, squares, and stars
encapsulating with clear acrylic

If you like post like this please let me know or +1 this on google plus. Unfortunately I couldn't do sets to show you these products I hope the practice hands are cool. What to see future sets let me know!

Hope this help some of you roses!

Petals Falling Until Next Time!

xoxoxo Love you Guys!

Thursday, October 1, 2015

Buying Cheap Resources for your College Courses.



With the act of making community college free in some areas of this country. Many of us are now being faced with the fact that college material doesn't provide all the information that we need to understand a particular topic better. Some of us (especially those who had to actually study at some point in our lives without the internet) rather do our researching through books and if your an online student like me sometimes the glare of the computer can get to you.

If your a (Post-Internet Learner) or You simply love books then Www.AbeBooks.com is for you! of course this is just to help some people out so here is my experience with Abe Books.

First, My mom being obsessed with cookbooks put me on to this method of shopping for books intelligently. She would spent hours at a time borrowing through this site where you could buy books at a cheaper price. Most of her recently brought cookbooks where 5 dollars and under. This didn't really interest me much until I started college and realized that I could get resources such as " Guide to Writing Sociology Papers" and "The Pursuit of Happiness" for under 5 dollars.

Abebooks.com isn't just for academic material the also have a large collections for every genre you could think of and unlike most sites you can definitely find something you want to read or always wanted to buy but didn't see your self parting away from $20.00 just for a day or two of reading.

Recently, I was cause in a delimma my online course material cost 
$92.00 and they recommended that I had purchased the hard copy that material for $82.00. I just simply couldn't see myself spending $200.00 (including taxes) for the online and hardcopy of the same exact material. With my knowledge of this site I copied the isbn # and found the same exact book on Www.AbeBooks.com for $3.45 but it was sold out so I looked at other site that offer affordable book deals like www.thriftbooks.com  and even Amazon have deals too it all in the matter of shopping around and shopping smart. Yes most of the material are second handed but when it come to college material who cares as long as its the same information and its in a good condition?

I really hope this helped my fellow college heads/ readers out there!

Love You Guys!xoxoxo!

Petals Falling Until Next Time!